Getting pregnant is supposed to be easy…isn’t it?

getting pregnant

The other day I got asked if our pregnancy was a planned one.  Well let’s see, it took 3.5 years, a range of tests, being poked and prodded, pills, a surgery, more pills, and injections.  So to say it was planned is a bit of an understatement.

My story with infertility is not an uncommon one, it’s actually much more common than any one of us would like it to be.  We all just assume that when we’re ready to have kids it will be as easy as simply going off birth control.  But the reality for many couples is that it’s a long and complicated road filled with disappointment, shock, tears, and many many prayers.  But even though my story isn’t unique, it’s still somehow a topic that not many people want to discuss.

My husband and I were married for about a year when we decided to just leave it up to nature and see what happens.  So I went to my gynecologist to have my yearly exam and make sure everything was good.  And it was, supposedly.  But then time just kept going by and nothing.  Months and months passed, so we began to wonder if something was wrong.  I went back to my doctor and she immediately began a series of tests, then she sent my husband for tests.  Then there were more tests, and more tests.  It seemed to be an endless cycle of test with no answers.  My doctor was a highly recommended one and yet she didn’t seem to be making any progress in finding answers, so it became clear that we needed a second opinion.  That’s when a bit of fate stepped in, my husband was offered a job in Puerto Rico, so we were moving.

If you’ve ever moved you know it can be a bit stressful so we took a break from the fertility thing and decided to just focus on the move.  I won’t go into details about it but lets just say the move took a lot longer then expected, as in a couple of months longer.  But once we got to Puerto Rico I started my search for the best doctor, and I found him.  Within the first five minutes of meeting him I knew he’d be the one to help us achieve our dream, and he did.  It took another 8 months or so of investigation, treatments, a surgery, and more treatments, but we got there.  We were blessed with a beautiful little miracle, a baby boy.

It’s a strange thing when you first find out you’re pregnant after so long of trying to get there, it takes a while for it to sink in.  When I got pregnant I took at least 5 of those home pregnancy tests and still wouldn’t believe the positive result I was seeing.  It wasn’t until I went to the lab and got a blood test that I finally accepted that it was really happening, that I was really pregnant.  I remember holding that envelope with my test results in my hand and I didn’t want to open it.  I was afraid that it would say that all of the home pregnancy tests had been wrong.  When I did open it and saw that I was indeed pregnant I just cried, happy tears of course.  Then I sent a photo of it to my husband who was at work.  That man has never called me back so fast when he’s working! haha.  It was definitely a happy day.

I’m so grateful that my husband and I are a success story.  We never gave up, we changed doctors (we would have even if we hadn’t moved), we kept going back, we did what we had to do so that we could achieve the dream of parenthood.  It took several years but now we are so blessed to have our precious baby boy.  Our prayers were answered.

I wanted to tell my story not so that I would be showered with sympathetic comments, I wanted to tell my story because it might help even just one person to know that they’re not alone in their struggle.  I know what it’s like to be disappointed month after month, I know the frustration in not knowing why you can’t conceive, I know what it’s like to have your body feel like it’s been given over to medical experiments, and I know how lonely all of that can feel.  When my husband and I were struggling we had each other, but it often felt like we were the only couple having trouble conceiving, and that can feel really lonely.  I would never wish infertility on anyone, but there is a comfort in knowing that you’re not alone.  So if telling my story can bring even just a slight bit of comfort to just one couple, then it’s worth telling.

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63 thoughts on “Getting pregnant is supposed to be easy…isn’t it?

  1. I had a co-worker that also had difficulty getting pregnant and the tests and injections, etc…we’re done but definitely stressful for her & her husband. Right before starting in vitro they stopped everything to clean out the system and she found out she was pregnant at her first in vitro appt!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Sharing your story is a kindness to others who are on similar journeys. Thank you for being willing to do that. Congratulations on your precious baby! I’m so happy your story ended with success. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I keep hearing more and more about couples that cannot conceive. Maybe it’s just me, but it seems to be getting pretty commonplace now? Glad things worked out for you in the end, and you can share your story about your journey.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It does seem to be more common nowadays doesn’t it? Not sure if it’s happening more often or if it’s just that people aren’t afraid to talk about it anymore. Either way I think it’s good to share, it helps when you know you’re not alone. Thank you for reading 🙂


  4. Liz Da Ponte

    Thank you for sharing your story. I know several women who had trouble getting pregnant. All of them commented about the pressure they felt was put upon them. Like, they were married/in a committed relationship, why *wouldn’t* they be pregnant?

    Pregnancy seems to be one of those topics that still has a lot of misconceptions about.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes that is so true. There is a lot of pressure, most people just expect you to have a kid a year into marriage. Now I’m seeing that with a 1 year old everyone expects us to have a second! Guess I have a new topic to blog about…
      Thank you for commenting 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Thank you so much for sharing this, it isn’t an easy road for everybody. I’m sure many can relate, and it is humbling for others who may not think about what pregnancy really is like for some people.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I have a good friend who just got pregnant after IVF. It was a really long road for her, and she’s in that cautiously optimistic phase at this point. Congratulations on the birth of your son 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Some people destined to have a child or children some people don’t. Either way we should embrace our lives. Congratulation on your pregnancy. I’m sure it was such intense happiness when you see the result of blood test.


  8. Ochalina

    Some people destined to have a child or children, some people don’t. Either way we should embrace our lives. Congratulation on your pregnancy! I’m sure it was such intense happiness when you see the result of your blood test.


  9. Because... I'm cheap

    We’ve been married for almost 5 years now. No kids yet. I used to stress about it. A lot… but am trying to take it in stride now. It’s not easy for everyone. That and we will be moving forward with fostering to adopt within the next year 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Taking it in stride is easier said then done isn’t it? It’s not easy but many of us go through it. Glad to hear you’re moving forward with adoption, starting a family can happen in many ways! Thank you for commenting 🙂


  10. Eileen xo

    What a beautiful post to start 2016! By sharing your story you are definitely helping others who may be suffering and losing hope. I am so happy for your wonderful news – many blessings

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Thank you for sharing! We’re going to be trying to start a family in the near future and one of my fears is having difficulty getting pregnant. It’s always nice to hear stories of others. It reminds me that you’re never alone in anything.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. It is interesting to hear other couple’s stories about fertility. My sister-in-law had a lot of issues due to PCOS. I think that we all need to be supportive in every journey, and sometimes it is hard to know what to say.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I still cannot believe people ask others if their babies are planned. I think that’s really rude. I am happy to hear that you found a doctor that was really helpful. It’s really important to find physicians that you feel comfortable with!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. modaddicted

    Your approach to your situation is very inspirational and can be transferred to anything in life from the most simple things to huge problems like yours. Congratulations on your baby boy and best wishes to you and your family this 2016. My mom suffered from years of infertility after giving birth to me just like you, but it was due to a miscarriage. She became so obsessed on having a children and scared at the same time of going through another miscarriage, that her brain blocked the ovulations process. It is an issue that affects so many women across the globe and due to different causes. It is very comforting and inspirational to listen to testimonials of women like you of how they came through it.

    Happy new year!!! <3<3

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Thanks for sharing your story. Reassuring people they are not alone is a noble thing.

    There’s so much pressure and questions of identity wrapped up in having children.

    I’m glad that you got your baby boy after the many trials, tests and disappointments.


    Liked by 1 person

  16. How beautifully brave of you to share your story, I agree it is something which isn’t talked about enough – The reality is that average is 1 year – but that doesn’t make it easier month on month, I’m finding, your story gives me hope and made me smile though – so thank you 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  17. The Anxious Dragon

    Fertility problems seam to be on the rise at the moment, or maybe its just that people are much more willing to talk about the subject now. Sharing your story is a brilliant thing to do, and will hopefully offer some hope and comfort to others in a similar situation.
    Thank you for linking up, Tracey xx #abitofeverything xx

    Liked by 1 person

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  19. Thanks for sharing this. I went through fertility treatment with my ex husband and it was a very difficult time for both of us. People wrongly assume, given that I have four children (and three under three) that getting pregnant just came easily to us and yet nobody knows what others are going through at times. #fartglitter

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Love this. After having to go through IVF to get our tot I am insanely jealous of people who just enjoy a few extra romps in the sack. I really happy you got tour little miracle in the end 😊
    Thanks for linking up to #fartglitter

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Oh, I really feel for you reading this post. I am so thrilled that you didn’t give up and now have your miracle baby. Before you try for a baby you assume it will all be easy. That you’ll get pregnant quickly and have an easy pregnancy and breeze through labour. The reality can be so different. And I think it is so important to share these stories. We have a little girl, who is two and a half and I am now pregnant with our second child. But in reality this is my sixth child as I have had four miscarriages. It is tragic and so hard to explain to anyone who hasn’t faced these difficulties but hopefully by sharing our stories people will feel less alone. Thanks for linking up to #SundayStars. Hugs Lucy xxxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m sorry to hear you’ve experienced those losses. I wish you the best with this pregnancy, many blessings to you and your family. Miscarriage is another unfortunate reality that is much more common then many people think. Hopefully speaking out helps you as well as anyone else who has experienced the same. Thank you for commenting.


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